Wasting time on wellknown thoughts
I am not gonna give too much energy and thought to this. I already gave too much in my head and it’s really draining me. I feel like that weight in my chest increases every time that I know for sure that I am not seen by you the same way I see you. It hurts to nearly faint the fact that I keep falling for people I admire. And it seems that I love adding some difficulty to that admiration process or person who contains all the cool stuff I would love to be. The difference with women I admire is that I possibly would not get confused. But in case of a guy I almost tend to throw myself into their whole reality and then I look to my stuff and it’s all there unattended. Even if I realize about my feelings and I know for sure that I have a strong connection with you that makes me shiver from inside, I know that there’s always a risk I loose myself by “admiring” you. I cannot say “like” because it sounds as a really low emotion, but saying “love” it sounds really scary and